A fond final Cherwell

A fond final Cherwell… Giving credit where credit is due, the wonderful headline comes from CherWorld.com, but it captures our weekend to SoCal.

We took the traveling typepad to Hollywood this weekend to see the final final for Cher’s Living Proof Farewell Tour 2005. Cher had come through Washington three times. I missed her the first time, so on the second round, DMV got me tickets for my birthday. (I discovered this weekend that he didn’t actually buy the tickets on eBay until days before that concert.) Cher came through DC for a third pass, but we had plans and so we missed that one. But then Cher announced that she was going to shut down this tour, which she says will be her last. And if one was going to do a final concert, it would seem that the stars are aligned correctly. She show was 40 years almost to the day after Cher performed her first concert with Sonny -- also at the Hollywood Bowl. So when Cher made the announcement, I quickly called my father. He is a Bowl season ticket holder, so I thought he might have some pull. And he did. We had great seats about 15 rows back. I’ll post the poor camera phone photos when I figure out how to transfer them over.

But I’m getting ahead of the story.

I flew out Friday – DMV had gone out earlier in the week for business. On Saturday, we did the perquisite tour of my father’s apartment building. He’s so cute because he is so proud of the building and the facility. And you have to give him credit – they are really nice! If I had to live in an apartment, it’s a nice place to live.

Given that we were in my old neighborhood, I called my best friend’s parents to see if we could do a pop-in. When we did, they had a neighbor over who said his friends tried to see Cher Friday – the next-to-the-last-show – and he said that they were stymied by gridlocked traffic. I panicked because I know what a horrible frustrating feeling that is. Years ago, I tried to go see Fleetwood Mac’s first reunion tour at the Nissan Pavilion and ended up spending more than two hours sitting in traffic, a trip that shouldn’t take more than an hour tops. Needless to say, I have never been back to Nissan. But I wasn’t going to let traffic interfere with our Cher-ebration!

We decided that we would have dinner in Hollywood and walk to the Bowl. (I generally prefer the low stress route. I’d rather get to the airport an hour early rather than having all the stress of rushing. DMV does not share that opinion, unfortunately, and it has led to some of our biggest fights.) We made reservations at the Hotel Roosevelt, a wonderfully remodeled hotel on Hollywood Boulevard across from the famous Chinese Theater – yes, the same Chinese theater where people are lined up to see the final Star Wars movie although the movie is not going to be showing at the Chinese Theater. We had a wonderful dinner at Theodore’s and then made on the 20-minute hike up the hill to the Bowl. And traffic wasn’t all that bad. I mean, it wasn’t free flowing, but it wasn’t gridlocked. So we make the 20-minute walk, there were people dressed up as Cher – of course. As we approach the Bowl enterance, there were religious fanatics out front with anti-gay messages. “Gays are sodomites,” one said, which is difficult to argue with. Most gays are, in fact, sodomites. Of course, not all sodomites are gay, but… From the look on the faces of most of these people, they could have used a little sodomy. Another sign said, “Gays like fecies – ‘skat’” Ah yes, I can’t get enough – sh*t pancakes for breakfast, sh*t, tomato and mozzarella for lunch, and sh*t soup for dinner… I always wonder what these people really hope to accomplish. Does anybody – let alone anybody at a Cher concert – walk away saying, “You know, those gays… they DO like skat.”

Of course, the concert crowd seemed like there was a direct bus line from West Hollywood to the Bowl. There was a high gay quotient – no shock there.

As I said, we had great seats. We did not realize that there was going to be an opening act – the “official” Village People, no less. They were actually much better than I expected. The biker boy – well, not really a “boy” anymore, but...  – is still in great shape. And they seemed really thrilled to be there. They finished up their show and had not sung YMCA, so you just know there is another song coming, right? There was.

And then – Cher!

The 57-year-old diva (she turns 58 on May 20) is just fabulous. (She only ranks second to Tina Turner in terms of putting on a great show… and that’s saying a lot!) I have now listened to and seen this show numerous times. She starts off lowering from the ceiling on a chandelier singing U2’s “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for” and then quickly launches into her own stuff. The order of this show was different then both the televised version and the version we saw in DC, but the heart of them are there. Actually this show seemed to be considerably longer – about two hours. She does a great job using video clips, which allows her costume changes, which are numerous. She only does “I got you babe” using the video, including clips from her famous appearance on Letterman’s old NBC Late Night program, where she appeared with Sonny. Her first monologue is also different from the broadcast version. In the recorded version, she says that she wanted to make the show fabulous because there are all these young girls coming to take… “well they’re not going to take my place, but they are going to take somebody’s place.” She said that one of those girls – “I’m not going to say which one, but she has a very big butt!” – complained about being called a whore. I’m just joking, she said. But she said she has a motive for making the show so fabulous. She wanted to say to those girls, “Follow this, you bitches.” And, in fact, at the conclusion of the show, she did say it – in fireworks on top of the Bowl at the conclusion of the program!

She said that this would be the end of her 325 day tour and she said that she would not do another final tour like so many other artists. "This is the last time - 'cause I'm approaching 80." She suggested if she did, she would be riding a rhinestone-encrusted Liberty Scooter.

The show was everything we could have hoped for. The great thing about Cher is that she is a performer. She has that Tina Turner quality where she just goes out there and puts out 100 percent. In one of the video montages, she says that she has never been liked by singers and that she has never really been liked by actors… but she does her thing! And she sure did it well!

Two celeberity sightings... "Jo" from the "Facts of Life"... and Michelle Lee from Knots Landing "fame"

Then on Sunday, a baseball game – yes, me! – in my father’s fabulous Dodgers seats that are about four rows back from home plate. (A friend commented, "Only the two of you can do those two events in one weekend!") Now THAT’s the way to see a baseball game! Then dinner with my cousin and a viewing of “The Witches of Eastwick,” of course.

So… a huge thanks to my father and step-mother for getting the tickets and hosting us for the weekend! We had a great time!