Some of the news that is fit to print

Almost Star Wars, but not quite...

So the Organic Trade Association has a fantastic movie on its Web site -- Grocery Store Wars -- a spoof of Star Wars, of course. But this five-minute online movie features the case of Cuke Skywalker, Princess Lettuce, Chewbroccoli and other organic rebels dressed as Star Wars characters -- battle it out with Darth Tader, the evil lord of the Dark Side of the Farm.

"These are dark times, young Cuke," says Obi Wan Cannoli. "An empire of pollution and pesticides has ruthlessly conquered the market, nearly wiping out our organic birthright." The site also lets you "learn the ways of the farm" and join the organic rebellion.

Meanwhile, Forbes.com talks about the feasibility of Star Wars technology and talk about Star Flops, such as the Star Wars holiday special.

And you just knew there was a political angle to the Star Wars hype -- yes, it is Gulf Wars!

I am humbled by the creativity!

Halloween tidbits...

From Poynter... some Halloween facts

The United States produced 805 million pounds of pumpkins in 2003. Illinois was the largest pumpkin producer with 326 million pounds.

The Census Bureau says:

There also were a whole lot of pumpkin patches in California, Ohio, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and New York. Each produced at least 70 million pounds of pumpkins. The value of all the pumpkins produced by these states was $81 million... Source: http://www.usda.gov/nass/

Here is a great collection of other Halloween facts from the Census Bureau.

Clinton translated

As noted in Slate.com's Today's Papers:

Forget faux Louis Vuitton purses—the hot new knockoff on the streets of China is a revised (and Communized) version of Bill Clinton's autobiography, My Life. Explains the NYT:
[F]ake publishers have certainly managed to take plenty of liberties with the text. One of the best examples is the very long opening sentence of Mr. Clinton's version, which takes 48 words to detail his birth, even the stormy weather that preceded the big event. The first sentence in the pirated Chinese version says: "The town of Hope, where I was born, has very good feng shui." ... Another retranslation of the pirated translation last summer has Mr. Clinton explaining to Hillary that his nickname is "Big Watermelon."

Vegas follow-up...

So as you know, we were in Vegas last weekend with my sister and my brother-in-law to see Sir Elton’s super FAB show, Elton John and The Red Piano… and we have a A-level celebrity sighting…

We were sitting at Nobu at The Hard Rock Hotel and DMV said, “Who is that tramp trying to look like Paris Hilton.” Well, it WAS Paris Hilton! And her sister, Buffy or Muffy or Nikki or whatever her name is.

Needless to say, they look scrawny and skanky…

First off, she had this awful bleach-blond wig on… and then just a foolish blue taffeta-like dress… They were at two tables that had 15- or 20-people between them and they got up literally every five minutes to talk on their cell phone or smoke or WHATever they do. They also both had body guards, which I’m guessing was just something to make them seem more important.

Anthony said there is a British term for these folks: slappers.

slapper n. People who are on the pull for anything they can get. Anything. The word is applied more often to females (arguably because it is a built-in function of blokes and doesn't deserve a separate word). Slappers wander around the dance floor looking for the drunkest blokes and then, when they've found them, woo them by dancing backwards into them "accidentally". The are invariably spotted at the end of an evening telling the bouncer how lonely they are and trying to sit on his knee.

The many faces of Bush

Check out the many faces of Bush

More troops

Also from Poynter's Al Tompkins...

More Troops Needed?
Here is one of those developments that I have a feeling, months from now, we will look back on and recognize as more significant than we realized at first. Late last week, a Pentagon-appointed panel said the United States needs more soldiers if we are going to do all we are trying to do around the globe.
The New York Times said:
Portions of the study, which has not been officially released, were read into the public record on Thursday by Sen. Jack Reed of Rhode Island, a leader of Democrats who want to expand the size of the military.
During testimony by Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld and his top commanders, Reed said he found the study "provocative and startling."
Rumsfeld said the report was an "excellent piece of work," and that he had ordered briefings on its findings for senior military and civilian officials.
But he cautioned after the hearing that the section read by Reed was not a comprehensive synopsis, and that the authors of the study may not be fully aware of steps under way by the Pentagon to lessen stress on the force, and actions taken specifically by the Army to increase the number of available combat forces without further expanding the military.
Reed said the Defense Science Board study found "inadequate total numbers of U.S. troops" and "a lack of long-term endurance."

This is a critical issue right now – and one of the most important ramifications resulting from the unnecessary war in Iraq – our military is now so taxed, that we are terribly limited about what we can do elsewhere in the world. Our defenses are stretched too thin that should something serious happen elsewhere in the world, we have few options.
These things make us less safe today.
And all for an unnecessary, misguided war.

OB-SEEN

From Poynter's Al Tompkins:
License Plate Complaints [Poynter]
The Smoking Gun is back with another collection of complaints from people who spot potentially offensive auto license tags. This collection is from Washington state and is the third state collection TSG has created. They also have complaint files from Florida and New York. What are you waiting for? What fun.

Comparison-shopping for president

From CBS MarketWatch's Frank Barkano's Internet Daily

Comparison-shopping for president

Since TV commercials try to push a political candidate the same way they seek to sell a new car, maybe we should think of voters as shoppers. That's what PriceGrabber, an Internet comparison-shopping tool, and the University of Southern California's Center for E-Government did.

The result is a Web site where you can compare and contrast national and statewide candidates' backgrounds, fund-raising totals and positions on issues.

"People are accustomed to using the Internet for research, and it's natural that they will look online to examine political candidates," said USC representative Gregory Curtin in a statement.

About 110 candidates are in the database. You can search by state, gender, age, office, marital status and so on. See the presidential comparison-shopper tool.

High school nightmares

Via a Yahoo! picsPlanetDan's Senior Photo Collection: Volume 1
There's a lot riding on the notorious senior class photo. For many teens, high school is a four-year prison sentence filled with constant embarrassment -- and a good senior photo should, in theory, capture their blossoming maturity and wipe away the bad vibes. More often than not, however, they suck. Big time. And what better way to rub it in than this parody of hapless teens in their most uncool and awkward poses? We don't normally laugh at defenseless youth, but come on, now. Can we all look at the camera and say, "Cheese"!?

Take THAT Santa

City May Ban Low-Flying Reindeer
The Deseret News says Salt Lake City is about to actually strike a clause that allows THE Claus to fly at low altitude and not be in violation of the law. The city says it is a security issue. I am not making this up.